Interesting conversation last night with my new Hubby! His comment on my Blog Post is that it is clear to people that I am talking about something I am passionate about…….HIM!! haha just joking ! What he meant was that I was simply creatively expressing my truest truth about my experience and coming from a level where I was sharing from my heart and that also shows people my vulnerability. This in turn, allows people to feel they are have a ‘Real” experience of me.
Often when we are perceived ‘experts’ in something we actually fail to make a true connection with people because they feel we are sharing something that is “beyond them” or even worse talking down to them. I totally get what my hubby is saying and I have definitely been in situations where I have done this. Often it comes from a need to ‘prove my worth’ , let’s say in a job or work situation and I have definitely been feeling this lately as I was made redundant from the job I was in last year and decided ( once again!!!) to follow my bliss and create my own business and partnerships with people that I can work with creatively. Basically taking myself out of the ‘expert’ arena and into very unfamiliar territory that I am still very very uncertainly, feeling my way around. Instead of following the pay check I have decided to follow my heart…….
And it’s been really really tough!!!!!! Amazingly people around me still seem to see me as successful and really creating something and I just feel like I am failing forward!!!!! It’s quite bizarre!
I absolutely know for a fact that other entrepreneurs have felt or do feel like this at one time or another and whilst we tend to focus on their success rather than their failures which can make them seem like an ‘Overnight success’ – I would suggest that in fact there is no such thing! The failures actually add up to the success and without them you may never find what it is your really passionate about, or what really creates something.
The Guy who invented the light bulb – Edison – was actually not the first person to try and it certainly was not his first attempt at doing so that got him success. Yet no one really talks about all the failed attempts prior to that – why would we? And that’s my point no one really knows how hard the entrepreneurial journey is until they are on it…….failing forward as I am! Making some mistakes, learning some lessons, standing on the shoulders of giants and occasionally falling down. My husband has the quote on his phone ” Failing is not falling down, it’s refusing to get up again”. And so us Light Bearers we just keep getting up again and again. Even when nothing makes sense and you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s just what we do.
The reason I am sharing this with you is because I want you to see me. Not just the person you perceive me to be. If that helps one other person then that level of Vulnerability is worth it and THAT to be perfectly honest is the WHOLE HEARTED JOURNEY. The one where you embrace it all and realise that life is not positive experiences and perfection – it’s everything all rolled into one. We need to learn to accept it all with our WHOLE HEART so we can transmute it into something else as everything always does.
I have been watching Dr Brene Brown talk about Vulnerability with Oprah and it is so true that there is so much SHAME in our society particularly where we feel like failures which is really a collapsing of “BEING A FAILURE” with “EXPERIENCES OF FAILURE”.
My journey is no different than yours, we are in this together and no one is getting out of here alive ( haha) and ALL we really have is experiences of connection which we get through sharing with one another. Not so that we become our story, but so that we emerge from our story WHOLEHEARTED souls having this human experience. And that is true Vulnerability.
If there is anything I can share with you that you think will help please let me know in the comments below
Love to you allxxx